Chester...

"I've given up, I'm suffocating"

The air I breathe keeps burning in my lungs

Hatred fills the world and all those in it

Death seems like the only option

I'm hanging by a thread already, hanging myself doesn't seem much different

“I’ve become so numb”

My body is overcome with so much strain

Holding on to ward off all the pain

I have no feeling in my hands from clenching my fists so hard

Trying to fight back the ones who comment so negatively

My phony friends who pretend to have my back and proceed to stab me in it

A family that wants me to change everything I am

My knees feel week upon standing to defend myself and my fading dignity

“Why is everything so heavy?”

My heart, my eyes, the crosses I bear

Everyday, I feel “my walls are closing in”

Like there’s nowhere to escape the agony

The demons keep “crawling in my skin”

Yet they still remain through my deafening screams

It’s so damn hard to impress the world

And be true to myself at the same time

“All I wanna do is trade this life for something new”

One where I feel at ease without this constant anxiety

“I wanna feel like I’m somewhere I belong”

Somewhere I can be myself without facing criticism

Or feel like I have to paint on a brave face every single day

But I’m sick of tired of putting up a fight

And therefore “I’m breaking the habit tonight”

It’s not entirely over yet, there’s still a chance to save me from myself

While I’m “waiting for the end to come”, someone can come sit and talk to me

Ask me how I’m doing, provide a listening ear

Hold me through my shaking in fear

I need a confidant who will listen to me and walk me through this bloody hell

“It starts with one”